


Where the World Fades Away

by fadedmystery



Series: Tell Them about It [2]
Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: Engagement, Henry and Alex are precious cinnamon rolls and need to be protected at all costs, Telling Henry's family, Whoops now everyone knows too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-10-24 10:44:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20704679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fadedmystery/pseuds/fadedmystery
Summary: And then it hits— that mild, blooming panic crawling up Henry's spine as the two men look at each other and realize that, while they'd casually talked about how to tell their families about the engagement, they'd never actually talked about how to tell everyone else.Goodness, they truly are disasters. No wonder they deserve each other.





	Where the World Fades Away

"I cannot emphasize enough," Bea says cheerfully as she shifts a little on her bed from Henry's phone screen, "how much you two absolutely did not think any of this through."

Henry rolls his eyes but smiles at his sister. "Blame Alex, he's the one who proposed."

"Hey!" Alex protests. "You didn't have to say yes, you know. You didn't even have to wear the ring. It's not my fault I'm irresistible."

Alex is pouting, but his eyes are alight with amusement and it still takes Henry's breath away that he can have this man, this future together. "Please. Like I'd ever have any other answer to those questions. Still, impulse control, darling. It's a thing."

Alex, very maturely, sticks his tongue out at Henry. Henry pats his hair. From his phone screen, Bea clears her throat. "Please tell me your banter hasn't developed into a weird form of foreplay because I am not awake enough to be witnessing this."

Alex laughs, and says something about how it technically can't develop since it's already been there since the beginning. Henry lets out a little breath. It's quite nice to be talking like this again, all three of them. If Henry concentrates hard enough, he can almost, _almost_ forget that outside these four walls, the world has, to put it delicately, gone absolutely insane.

"You do realize you just violated a law that's been around for hundreds of years right?" Bea points out in the same cheerful tone. She'd been miffed at finding out the news like this, but happy for them. "I'm proud of you. Way to make history, Henry."

"Just living up to our hashtag," Henry replies easily, even as he internally curses. He hasn't forgotten that stupid rule on seeking the Queen's permission before getting engaged. Not that he wants to of course, but Bea's remark brings to the surface a lot of the thoughts he's had over the past months, about protocols and laws and titles— why did even getting married have to be so complicated?

"Do you know how long it took me to get Henry to accept the idea of our hashtag?" Alex nudges him on the shoulder. "Good thing I convinced him. Many, many times."

"Of course you did," Bea says wryly.

"With my mouth," Alex adds helpfully. 

"I am putting an end to this line of talk," Bea makes a face at Alex, who grins back. "But seriously, what a way to tell the public though. Subtle but not really."

"But we haven't—" And then it hits— that mild, blooming panic crawling up Henry's spine as the two men look at each other and realize that, while they'd casually talked about how to tell their families about the engagement, they'd never actually talked about how to tell everyone else. 

Goodness, they truly are disasters. No wonder they deserve each other. 

And because the universe clearly has it out for them, a few minutes later, there's a knock before Nora peeks inside, phone by her ear. "Hey, sorry to interrupt but ah...thought you guys should know, your fandom's noticed the ring and they're going nuts so this'll probably be on the news in a few minutes."

Well. Looks like they have to face the music sooner rather than later, then. 

Nora pauses, nodding to whoever's on the phone. "Oh, and Henry, Pez says to tell you both 'congrats' and that you're a dick for letting him find out the news from fangirls instead of from you. He says all of this with love though. "

Henry winces. "Uh," he says with a sheepish grin. "Oops?"

Alex laughs, pressing a kiss to Henry's shoulder."I don't know whether to be worried or impressed that fangirls spotted it quicker than reporters did."

Nora nods at Alex. "And Alex, Pez wants to talk to you. In private." 

Alex glances at Henry, who shrugs. "That sounds...ominous but sure?" He gets up from the couch. "I'll be back, then we can talk about how we're gonna deal with this, okay babe?" Henry nods and watches as Alex follows Nora out of the room. 

Henry turns back to Bea. "Hey."

"Hi." Bea's smile turns gentler. "How are you doing? I gather this isn't how you wanted to tell people."

Henry can feel a little bit of his guard crack. "Honestly? I'm happy. I'm so happy and it doesn't seem real. And I'm terrified to leave this room because then it actually _will_ be real and I'll have to face everything that comes with that."

"Oh love," Bea sighs. "I'm sorry this is so complicated. I'd tell you it was worth it but—"

"—but that's not going to make things easier," Henry finishes. "I know. Thank you for being okay with this though. We really were going to tell the family right away but we didn't think our own stupidity would beat us to it."

"Hey, you did it on your own terms though. There's something to be said for that." Her gentle tone makes Henry suddenly wish that Bea were here to give him a hug. Her voice turns quieter. "Mum's going to be upset when she sees this though."

"I know." And he truly, really regrets that. His mother has gotten so much better, but she's been taking ever blip in their relationship as a sign that she needs to do better. Henry doesn't want mum to think that for a minute. "I'll call when she wakes up. Alex and I were thinking of flying there in a day or two but with the impending media circus, I guess we'll have to figure out what to do first."

"I can imagine Shaan and Zahra have their work cut out for them." Bea yawns a little. "I woke up way too early. I think I'll go back to bed. Do get some sleep, Henry, please?"

Henry feels too wired and wide awake, but he nods. "I'll talk to you soon okay?" 

The call ends and Henry stares at his phone, biting his lip. He spins the phone in his hand, lost in his own thoughts, but it's broken when Alex slips back into the room.

Henry smiles. "Hi, love. Good talk with Pez?" His smile turns into a frown. "Hold on, why do you look so pale?"

Alex has a haunted look on his face. "I never realized how many creative ways a pair of tongs and a stack of old CDs can ruin your life."

Henry decides he doesn't really want to know. "I'll give him a call tomorrow. Looks like we'll have to be making a lot of calls tomorrow."

"No shit," Alex snorts. "Its trending on Twitter already. Zahra wants to kill me again." 

Henry holds out a hand to Alex, who takes it, sits back down on the couch, and rests his head on Henry's shoulder. "So," Alex says with a sigh. "What do we do now?"

\----------------

It's chaos the next day. The White House and Buckingham Palace have decided to go radio silent while they figure out what to do, and people from both countries have been popping in and out of either place. 

Well. They did say they wanted better US-UK relations…

Alex and Henry are on lockdown while this whole thing is sorted out. They keep busy though, fielding calls and trying not to go on social media to see what's being said. From snippets they do hear from White House TVs though, the right-wing news is calling the engagement a publicity stunt, the more liberal news is celebrating it as history-making, and royal commentators are torn between congratulating the pair and being aghast at the blatant breach of protocol.

Henry has a long talk with his mum. She's honest about being upset at finding out the news this way, but mostly she's worried. Not worried over the marriage itself, but of the stress all the hullabaloo is going to cause Henry, especially since Gran is reportedly furious. Beyond all that, though, his mum is happy and calls him her brave boy. She also says she can't wait to see the ring. Henry tells her he loves her and he'll see her soon, and after the call ends he shuts his eyes, phone clutched tightly in his hands, and reminds himself to breathe. 

Henry calls Pez next, who happily lets him know he's on the way to DC to bother them all. He wisely decides not to ask about Pez and Alex's conversation.

No sooner does the call end when his phone rings again. It's Philip. Henry hesitates, hovering a finger to slide to Decline, but ultimately accepting the call.

"Gran's furious," Philip says without preamble. 

"So I've heard." Henry shifts the phone a little. "You don't sound so pleased either."

"You— of course not! How can I sound pleased when you— you're—" 

"What, that I'm engaged to a man? Sullying our already questionable bloodline?" Henry's voice sounds harsh even to his own ears.

"No, I— how can I be pleased to find out my brother's engaged through the tabloids?" Philip sputters, which makes Henry pause. He hadn't been expecting that. "That's not— you couldn't have called? Told us in person? This— not only is this not how our family does things, Henry, its also against basic decency!" 

Ah. That makes more sense. "So sorry I deprived the Palace of the royal announcement." Henry tries to sound casual, but he knows it sounds forced. "I figured, too many hyphens in our names— we might run out of paper."

"Henry." Philip sighs. "What happens if Gran doesn't grant you permission?" 

"Well, she doesn't have much choice now does she?" Henry doesn't even try to keep the bitterness out of his voice. Its sad that he can't imagine a world where his grandmother is happy for him. "It's already out there. She can't not grant it without seeming backwards. And anyway— I'm not looking for her permission. I'm my own person, Philip. Prince or not, no one can take that away."

Philip lets out a noise of frustration. "The Palace is going crazy trying to figure out how to fit the protocols to this. You could've at least given us some warning." 

"Oh, I'm so sorry that my life choices don't fit the outdated heteronormative protocols of the royal family," Henry replies, equally frustrated. You'd think they'd stop rehashing the same arguments. "It's the twenty-first century, Philip. We have to adapt somehow."

Philip is silent for a moment, long enough that Henry begins to wonder if the call has broken. Then, on the other end of the line, Philip lets out a breath. "I don't know what to tell you, Henry. You're asking for a change that's bigger than just yourself, and honestly, I don't know how to help you with that yet. But, everything aside, I...if this is your choice, if _Alex_ is your choice. I respect that."

Unbidden, there's a lump in Henry's throat at Philip's words. They've never been that close, and Henry doubts if they ever will be. What Philip just said isn't even the kind of affirmation he'd hoped from an older sibling. But for Philip, this is as much as he would get to approval, and while Henry doesn't need it, he appreciates it anyway.

"I— thank you, Philip," he says stiffly, clearing his throat. He struggles for a lighter tone when he adds, "What are the chances of Gran actually talking to me about this?"

Philip actually laughs at that. Neither of them find it funny. 

\----------------

Henry holes himself up in Alex's room— their White House bedroom— the rest of the day. 

Him and Alex have spent the day apart, busy with their own calls and meetings. Henry had made more calls and replied to a few more messages before ignoring his phone and crawling into bed. There's just…too much all at once. Too many thoughts in his head, buzzing around, competing with one another, each one feeling more urgent than the last.

Henry doesn't understand what he's feeling. There's happiness there for sure, but there's also the buzzing, that horrible feeling of emptiness that he can't quite understand, because how can he feel empty when his heart is so full? It isn't even a specific thing; sure, the whole engagement is a mess, but he knows everything is going to be fine. And yet....it's frustrating how his head and heart can't seem to reconcile themselves.

Therese would say that having conflicting emotions is normal. Therese is the nice lady who comes to their brownstone on Wednesdays and chats with him over tea; sometimes, he goes to her office instead (and lately, he's gotten more comfortable doing so without a disguise). Therese would say that emotions are tricky things and that he shouldn't demand himself to figure them out all at once. _It's all a gradual process of understanding,_ she'd say. _Don't force it, but acknowledge that it exists so you can work through it._ Easier said than done though.

He misses his dad. Dad would know what to say. Sometimes he wonders if he's idealizing his father, putting a basket of wishes of what he wanted his dad to be into the memory he held of the man. But no, he's sure— his dad would know how to make him feel a little less helpless. 

Henry lets out a harsh breath, looking at the time. Alex is due back in a bit. He doesn't want Alex to see him like this. Not that it matters, because Alex has seen him like this and he's never looked at Henry as anything less for it. But there's the part of his mind, the one that wears pretense as second skin and believes that duty outranks everything else, that resents letting someone see him so low. Even on the days he does want Alex, he doesn't really know what he wants Alex to do to make him feel better. He's spent so long being told to tough it out, to put on a brave face to mask any inner turmoil, that he can't decide whether what he needs is someone to tell him to soldier on, or to tell him that everything's going to be okay. His mind is a mess sometimes, he knows. He's trying to fix it though; it's just difficult. But he's trying.

He's not sure when he drifts off. But next thing he knows, Alex is sliding into bed and wrapping an arm around him. Henry relaxes into Alex's embrace, breathing out deep to lighten his shoulders.

"You okay?" Alex asks quietly.

Henry nods. "Just needed some space to think, is all."

Alex presses a kiss to his shoulder. "Okay. Do you wanna talk about the morality of the color yellow?" 

It's become a thing with them: Alex asking if Henry would like to talk about whatever's on his mind, or about something else. It had been tough at first. Alex had been frustrated that Henry didn't seem to feel like he could confide in him, and Henry felt that Alex was forcing him to talk. Many conversations later, they'd learned the art of give and take, to know when to push and when to wait for one to come to the other. 

Alex is like the sun, and Henry loves that he burns so bright yet recedes into a gentle warmth whenever someone needs it. It's almost impossible to articulate how much he loves him, but, giddily, Henry realizes he's going to have a lifetime to try. 

"Let's just take a nap before dinner," Henry says, eyes growing heavy again. Maybe later, they can talk.

"Yeah, okay." Alex brushes his thumb across Henry's hand. "Thank you," Alex says quietly, "You remind me to be strong and brave everyday just by being you, and I'm so damn lucky you chose me." 

Henry grins, trying for calm despite the loud thudding of his heart. It's always these quiet moments he treasures the most. "That's a relief, because it'd be pretty awkward for you to propose to me if you didn't actually like me."

He can practically feel Alex's eye-roll. "Smartass," he mutters. Alex tightens his grip. "Go back to sleep."

Henry's eyes are already drifting close. He faintly registers Alex's breathing evening out, the arm on his waist going slack. Later, they would get up and deal with whatever the future throws at them. But now...for now, in these quiet moments where the world fades away, they'll take whatever peace they can get.

**Author's Note:**

> This whole headcanon wouldn't leave me alone, so naturally I had to write about it. I promise I'm a responsible adult. 
> 
> Thank you for your lovely response to "Tell Them about It"! Your comments and kudos make my day brighter. <3


End file.
